Teenage motherhood vs. Teen mom..

After this show teen mom has came out, I feel like this country is going through an epedemic of teen girls getting pregnant. I don't know if it's hopes that they will be an MTV star on the show or if the show is just giving a wrong vibe, but let me fill you in on a few things that I know about being a teenage mother.. It's not all fun and games, and you don't see the half of it on the TV. Do you like the expensive clothes you wear? Like the buckle or things like that? Well for one, when you become a parent, it's more than likely you won't be able to afford that kind of clothes anymore. I know you see the girls on teen mom, with their name brand clothes, make up done, and nails and hair done...But that's not normally what happens, normally your too wore out and exhausted to even have time to worry about putting your make up on in the morning, and your hair just gets thrown up without even thinking about it. Society has changed dramatically over the years, but there is still discrimination against teens who get pregnant. Im not writing this to tell you that teen pregnancy is good or bad, because I wouldn't be the person I am today without my daughter..But I'm not promoting it either, because I know how hard it is to go through. Look around you, look at all your friends..When you have a baby and you have more priorities than going out and drinking and just being teens, you find out who your true friends are really fast, and let me tell you it's an awful feeling to think that people don't want to hang out with you anymore because you have to grow up to provide and support this child and be a good mother. When I was pregnant I moved back home to Kansas, and a lot of people from that podunk little town looked down on me, because here I was 17 and pregnant, without the father of my child. School was lack of a better term Hell..Some people whispered, some people laughed, and one person didn't know and called me fat. I dropped out in October of my Senior year so I could work full time so I would have money when the baby came. I tried to do an online highschool diploma program, but Im not good at teaching myself and I can't learn very well unless someone is in front of me explaining it so I can ask questions and such, so that didn't work either. About two and a half months later my life changed, Jacey was born, and I was a mother. Up until she was almost a year old, I worked two jobs so I could afford to buy her the things she needed and afford to pay the bills, I was still single at this time. Let me tell you there has been a lot of changes and a lot of difficulties between then and now, there was many illnesses, many stresses, and late nights with a fussy daughter.. Jacey's dad and I got back together July 2009, and were still going strong and going to get married in June. Everything is finally coming back together, I am going back to school...I didn't ruin my life, I just took a detour..But most teenage mothers drop out of school, and don't go back which makes it harder to get a job that they will make enough to support their children..This leads to welfare, I know welfare is there to help you, I have had to use it myself for the extra things  I couldn't afford, but to live off welfare for the rest of your life doesn't sound like a solid plan to me. Let's talk about Daycare, Do you really know how much that costs? Depending on how many kids it could be anywhere from 400 to 1000 dollars a month...Can you really afford that? There is a lot of emotional stress with becoming a mother, and that emotional stress has a lot to do with the self ful-filling prophecy. People are going to expect you to act a certain way, you are no longer a kid, and you have to grow up to set a good example for this child you are raising. I watch the show Teen Mom regularly, just to see what they are putting on there. The one's I don't like seeing on Teen Mom, is the one's that their parent's pay for everything...Seriously what are you going to learn from this if your parent's take the responsibility of paying your way through life? I had to work hard for everything I own, and I think everyone should have to do that. If you don't work hard for everything you don't appreciate it as much, and this could lead to major problems in the future, when you don't have to grow up and realize what you need to do, where you want your life to go, and how your going to get there. Another thing is the disrespecting of the mother from one of the girls, this is seriously not acceptable..Blood is thicker than water, and let me tell you guys when your friends all leave your side and you feel like you have no one to turn to, your family will always be there. You can't just act like a good mom in front of your friends, you need to actually be one. I have had my share of problems as being a teen mom, but I have overcome them and I am getting on with my life..My daughter is now 3 and let me tell you, she is into everything with a mind of her own, and an attitude like mine. The point I'm trying to get across here is that children are a blessing, but people need to realize the real situations you get put in when you become a teen mother, rather than what they see on TV..Children are meant for later in life after you finish your first obstacles such as; highschool, college, financial stability, and hopefully marriage. Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter she is my world and my life, she makes me who I am today, and Im very proud of that..But girls and boys you should really look into contraceptives if you are having sex with your significant other, because it's not all fun and games, there is very serious ordeals that come with being a teenage parent.

Domestic Violence.....It's real.

To all the girls out there, if you are ever in a violent relationship with someone, don't be afraid to get away and get help. There are many places to help you out there, you just have to look, voilent relationships normally don't get better, they tend to get worse as time goes one.. Unfortunately my friend Katie Anderson's life got taken because of a situation like this...So please don't hold out hoping it will get better...Get out and get help. Im glad Justice was finally served for her..Ryan Hurd Katie's boyfriend at the time got life in prison, but what does this tell our youth? It's ok to go out there and kill someone, because all you will get is a promised roof over your head, and hard working tax payers paying for you to live out the rest of your life, because you took someone else's. This doesn't sound right to me, but it's the way things are going to be. But seriously, if you need help, find it....No one wants to face the day that someone else takes their life, while they struggle and fight to breathe another breathe and get away to get help......Hope this opens everyone's eyes to the fact of the matter is it can happen to anyone. If you would like to read about Katie, go to owatanna.com click news and then click Hurd trial. God bless you Katie, I hope you have a better life up there. I miss you so much. Put me in a good word with god, I'll see you on the other side someday! <3